haha... Not Funny

I'm Lani B. This is my blog. I will put random facts here. All are true... or at least 85% true.

The 'B,' stands for bitch. No, not really... Okay, only sometimes.

You can trust me to be brutally, unforgivingly honest. Well, most of the time. Sorry.

My Goal in life is to have perfectly manicured eyebrows. You think I'm joking? I'm not.

I'm really good at getting tan. Way better than all those people who fake bake. I can get one by just going to the mailbox. And my mail box is attached to my house (... that's a lie, or just hyperbole).

Don't be afraid to comment.
Sun May 11

Awesome Discovery

My grandma likes the Office.

At least she has good taste in that aspect.

Can’t say the same about the guys she tries to set me up with…

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I got my haircut! I love it!
I got my haircut! I love it!
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Sat May 10
antoinetta:
(via premixed)
BRET!

antoinetta:

(via premixed)

BRET!

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The less they noticed you, the more you got them on the brain. Lust by Susan Minot via (thisrecording)

 Story of my adolescent life.

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Muxtape #2

FACT: It’s pouring outside right now.

So I guess it would be a good time to let you know my second muxtape is coming. And it’s perfect for this kind of weather, a bunch of rainy day love songs.

Tomorrow. Most def.

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It’s going to be absolute disaster, like a burrito before sex.

- jack Donaghy, 30 rock

so true 

(via kray)
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I can't find my cell phone.

So around 7 I called my friend Ashley, and we ended going to starbucks and then hanging out for a while at her house.

Somewhere in the process of the next few hours spent at her house I put my phone somewhere. I think it’s by her piano. I hope it is.

I had to be home by 10.30 according to my dad. And yeah, that’s early, but whatever. It was like 10.23. I know cause I looked at my watch. NOTE: Not my cell. And so we came up from her basement, I grabbed my purse and put on my flats. I noticed my purse felt slightly lighter. And that stupid little voice, women’s intuition I guess you could call it, screamed “CELL PHONE!?”

But I didn’t really feel like getting yelled at for being 5 mins late (even though I was a little late and my parents didn’t even care. :\). And so I just jumped in my car.

On the way home, I had that I’m missing something feeling, but it didn’t click. (And then to add insult to injury I hit my head getting out the car, really hard. It still hurts).

Then an hour and half later and I finally realized it. I went to my purse to try and find it, to no avail. Not in my jacket pockets. Not in my jean pockets. I didn’t remember touching it since… well Ash’s house. FUCK.

And I would’ve called ashley’s cell. But, oh yeah, her # is in my cell. DOUBLE FUCK. So I picked up the house phone, something I haven’t done in a while, and called my own damn phone. Which is probably sitting on Ashleys piano, lit up and vibrating.

I hope she finds in the morning and brings it on the way to her haircut… :(

I miss my cell.

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